Saturday, August 7, 2010
Can't He Come Home Yet?
I have 3 or 4 more months of waiting and feel like it is taking forever. I miss him so much and every day my heart aches. I am always so busy but sometimes I just can't shake this empty feeling especially when everything around me reminds me of him. I laugh and smile when a memory pops in or when my friends bring him up but I get a feeling of loneliness because I wish he was here. Is it mid deployment depression? I am not sure what this is. I have all these thoughts running through my head right now. I just love him and I want him to hold me. I want to smell him and wake up next to him. It just hurts sometimes and even though reading that I am not the only one feeling this way helps in one way and it also makes it worse because it seems so depressing that so many of us have to go through the same thing. I have the one person in my life that I truly trust and love. The one I want to be with for the rest of my life. I always try to be strong and this deployment sure has made me one trooper. I miss him so much. Can't he come home yet? I have always heard that one is the loneliest number, but I think one while waiting is even lonelier.
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